The Throat Puncher

"Mia, do you know why you are here today?"

"I really don't, your honour."

"I think you do."

"Nope, your honour. Excuse my language, but I think it's bullshit that I'm here."

"Mia, your nickname is 'The Throat Puncher'."

"I didn't choose that nickname."

"No, it was given to you by the media because of your actions."

"Justified actions."

"Not at all. Mia, you are accused of punching 37 people in the throat unprovoked. Not that you should ever punch people in the throat, but that's another talk."

"It wasn't unprovoked."

"Really, how so?"

"Well, this one woman was wearing really loud shoes. You know, the ones that click every time you take a step. So I just got up and did everybody a favour and punched her in the throat and told her to get new shoes."

"Yeah, you see, that's illegal. You can't just punch people because your impulse is telling you to."

"I can't help it. I must fight stupidity with violence. It's who I am."

"Well, who you are might make you end up in jail if you can't behave."

"What about that guy who was not letting his dog sniff anywhere it wanted? He just dragged it along."

"You could have a conversation with him about like most people who get a little triggered would."

"Your vocabulary isn't too professional, your honour."

"Mia, listen. I like you. I don't want to see you end up in jail. I think you are way too smart to be in this situation anyway."

"How about loud chewers? I mean, EVERYBODY wants to punch THEM in the throat. I'm just the only one with the balls to do it."

"That's true."

"Really?"

"No... no, I mean no. You still can't punch people in the throat. It's not alright. Now do you want to take the deal or not, Mia? If not, then we're going out there and it will go to trial."

"No deal."

"Mia."

"Your honour."

"Mia, are you absolutely sure?"

"Yes, let's trial this bitch."