The Plane Ride

I had a dream about you last night. We were on a big plane. A huge plane with room for an entire village it seemed. There were no economy seats and no luxury seats. Everybody flew business. I was going away for a job. A dream job. The plane was going to the other side of the world and really, I hadn't thought about you much up until that day. I didn't know you were both on the plane with me. I was sad that Jay hadn't told me. It made sense that you hadn't though. I knew the first stretch would last 8 hours so I had some wine so I could fall asleep. I woke up as we flew straight over the Empire State Building. I looked out at grubby New York. I felt happy it wasn't here we were stopping. I walked down the aisle to the toilet. I was in the back of the plane and for some reason I walked to the middle and walked up to the back again down the opposite aisle. And that's when I saw the two of you. Jay nodded and you completely ignored me. It made sense. My heart jumped up into my throat. My hands got shaky. Why were you here? I knew better than to talk to you. Although I was dying to know why she let you go. Then the disappointment of Jay not telling me you were going, hit me. I mean, Jay knew that I was going. He could've at least said you guys were going too. He was always so strict with keeping things seperate and it had been really cheap flight tickets, so in a way it made sense you'd got on this flight too. I sat by myself for a few hours. Suddenly we started to descend. I checked on the screen where we were. We were making a stop in New Orleans it seemed. We landed in the middle of a colourful street. People were happy to stretch their legs and get out. Everybody was really polite and kind to each other and to me. All the dads seemed to be wearing colourful Hawaii shirts and big smiles. It suddenly hit me how alone I felt. I decided to say hi to the both of you. I could say hi to Jay at least while you ignored me. I found myself doing the weird loop down to the middle of the plane and going up the aisle you were sitting at before getting out into the sunshine. You had already left your seats. I looked out the window on your side and saw you pass by. You were dragging a new motorbike along with you. You were smiling and chatting to Jay. You looked healthy. You grinned but stopped immediately when you saw my face. I could see your contempt for me flash over your face. I hadn't been able to stop myself from smiling at the fact you had a new motorbike. I panicked and gave you a thumbs up and nodded at the bike. Jay looked back and forth between the two of us anticipating what you'd do. You shrugged your shoulders and Jay smiled at me apologetically and you both continued down the sunlit street. I was on my own again. It was fine. I knew this was the path I chose for myself.